I closed a door today. I don't think he recognized it when it happened. I said I wouldn't be going away for the weekend with him because upon our return, we'd still be exactly where we were before we left. Nothing has changed about what I want.. or what he doesn't. So would a weekend trip change that? Unlikely. It's the same pattern we've had for six months. You'd think one of us would start to see it.
He later asked how I was doing and I didn't really want to talk. I mean, what would I say that I hadn't said prior - that had already not made a difference the first time? Second time? And why was I feeling more and more sad about the whole thing?
Because I guess I love him.
Loved?
Love.
No. Loved. Or it will be that way.. eventually. Whatever.
He wasn't really getting why I was down and I just couldn't explain it.
I said, 'I'm letting you go. I think you need to do the same.'
And I let that sink in.....
He replied, 'Ok.'
I might've cried at that point. It's unclear. The only witness was the cat and she's not talking.
6 comments:
Moving on, and leaving something that lessens us and that is less than what we desire is the stronger and braver act.
{virtual hug}
indi: Thanks sugar. I needed that. Hugs to you. xo
anonymous: Thank you!
I'm giving you a standing ovation over here. Can you feel it? I am so proud. Good for you. Yes, you.
Love you!
I just go an email, with video, from some cat. Cats cannot be trusted.
kario: Of course I can feel it. Thank you sugar.. Love you!
popeye: Heh.. I will be investigating that.
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